How Can I Tell if I’m Out of Alignment?
Shakespeare has been credited with these wise words: “To Thine Own Self Be True.”
It’s really the only way to live––to be in alignment with what matters most to us and for us. When we do, we have peace; when we don’t life just doesn’t feel right. We’re not in alignment with who we really are at the core of our being.
Misaligned with Myself
When I’m misaligned with myself, I can feel it in every inch of my body. When I don’t want to do something or I am procrastinating on a task, it is generally a sign I am out of alignment with what I really want at that moment––even if it is something that I normally love to do.
Once I can identify that I’m not in alignment, I can usually get myself back around to what I really want to be doing and creatively figure out how and when to accomplish the task. I may need to postpone my actions. I may need to delegate a task, and sometimes, I may decide that it (whatever it is) doesn’t need to be done at all.
Recently, I did not want to write a speech during the timeframe that I had scheduled to work on it. Instead, I decided to go to a movie with Dana and relax that day. I rescheduled the speech drafting day to the following week, and it worked out just fine. If I had forced myself to write the speech, rather than engage in some relaxation and entertainment, that speech might not have been of the quality I wanted, and it might have taken me longer to write it.
Misaligned with Another
When I am triggered by the behavior of someone else, I used to think it was them. Then I progressed to believing we are just out of alignment with each other. Which can be the case––but I don’t start there, now. Instead, I realize that it is usually that someone has inadvertently not cared for a core value that is important to me. Therefore, it is critical for me to have that kind of clarity to decide what my next step will be to obtain alignment.
Not too long ago, I was talking with Tony, a mutual friend of my colleague, Jasmine. Tony shared with me how fortunate I was that Jasmine did all the work on one of my recent projects. I smiled, knowing that Jasmine had done her part and I had done my part on the project; we had worked together. I was mad for about three days and could not figure out why I was so upset at Jasmine. Was it because she had not given me credit? Was it because she gave herself all the credit? I finally realized that it was not about credit for me, it was that her words were wholly inaccurate and this was out of integrity. Since integrity is one of my top core values, I was hugely upset. Once I understood that, I spoke with her and she owned that she exaggerated her involvement and apologized to me. Knowing my trigger helped me clarify what was happening and what I needed to do to get back in alignment with her.
Wise Words from a Wise Woman
Michelle Obama, said, “I have learned that as long as I hold fast to my beliefs and values––and follow my own moral compass––then the only expectations I need to live up to are my own.
I know that the only person I am responsible for is myself. I need to live up to my own expectations. And so do you. Where are you living in alignment with your core values? Where are you allowing others to trample upon your values?
Jump on over to my Facebook page and let me know what you think.
P.S. Hey San Diego people. Want to have more peace, purpose and freedom in your life? Join me for an 8-week (2/4-3/25) class on Monday nights; 6:30 p.m.-8:30 p.m. at Universal Spirit Center. Sign up here to join me.
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